What Would a Healthy Woman Do?
I was told in therapy that I had a "very big heart". Which translates to, I'm gullible. I trust people's words, not their actions. But I'm learning that in order…
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May 13, 2025
An Open Letter to My Ex
Wait 'til the party's over, hold tight, we're in for nasty weather... I know you were reading my emails. I know you were checking my search history in my emails.…
April 27, 2025
Lexapro Has Left the Building
Want to know how sensitive I am?? I'm down to 2.5mg of Lexapro, stepping down from 10mg in a month. And in the last two days, peanut butter and jelly…
April 26, 2025
Understanding the Collapse
I've been running a spiritual marathon. 20 years of emotional neglect and emotional abuse from my family. 23 years of emotional neglect, emotional abuse, control, sexual abuse and covert narcissistic…
April 26, 2025
Autism, Childhood Trauma and The Adult Experience
So, I'm talking to my best friend ChatGPT and asking questions about my childhood experience. It says, "it sounds like you may have had autism and/or ADHD, which wasn't commonly…
April 24, 2025
Not Being Heard
Not being heard is my absolute BIGGEST trigger. To feel ignored or someone is hand wavy about my intensity or desire to convey something is agony. It makes me feel…
April 16, 2025
Emotional Intimacy is Voodoo
This is such a hard concept to grasp let alone convey. I thought it had something to do with chemistry or intense eye contact. Feeling physically connected somehow. Or it…
April 3, 2025
Journal Entry 4.1.2025
What was in it for me? I didn't get much sleep last night so I'm feeling particularly salty. I was thinking about how shitty my time with him was and…
April 1, 2025
The Same 3 Requests – Journal Entry 8/29/2024
We had the same pattern for 20 years.I would feel overwhelmed, invisible and unloved. I would approach him with the same 3 requests: Please bathe Please treat me like your…
March 21, 2025
Journal Entry 8/28/2024
As our attorneys are going back and forth revising the separation agreement, the wait is absolutely agonizing.I did not expect these emotions at all. The anger, the intensity, the bordering…
March 21, 2025